Thursday, November 10, 2011
Sexual Abuse - Protecting Your Child
Sexual Abuse - Protecting Your Child
Safeguarding our children should begin very early in
life. And many safeguards are dependent
upon the parent actions in a variety of ways. Here is a limited list of some of the
considerations.
- Don’t insist that your child hug or kiss relatives or friends. Allow then to express appropriate affection on their terms.
- Let your child know that their feelings are important. Intervene in situations where you notice that a child is not comfortable with what adults ask them to do. However, this is not a means by which a child should escape their responsibilities such as cleaning up after themselves.
- When a child is a toddler begin teaching them the proper names of body parts.
- As a preschooler begin teaching your child about private body parts and how to say “no” if anyone attempts to touch them or makes them uncomfortable. Give then direct answers about sex.
- In the early elementary years talk to children about good touches and bad touches and how to be safe when away from home.
- By late elementary school focus on teaching your child about personal safety issues.
- In the teen years discuss issues such as rape, date rape, HIV, pregnancy and other sexually related topics. Take advantage of “teachable moment.”
- Know where your child spends their time.
- Make unannounced visits to the nursery, daycare center or school. Make sure there are not areas considered off limits to parents.
- Determine if your child’s school or church programs require child protection training for staff and volunteers. What is the staff and volunteer screening process? Is there a two-person rule which limits your child being alone in a one to one situation with another adult?
- DO NOT allow a child to go alone on a “vacation” or other outing with any adult other than parents or highly trusted family members.
- DO NOT allow your child to travel alone with any adult to school, church or other destination.
- DO NOT allow your child to accept expensive gifts from adults, particularly those who single them out.
Please do not hesitate to post specific questions.
In my next post I will address a growing area
of risk; the internet and other electronic means of communications.
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Child Sexual Abuse – Consider the Reality
In light of the recent reports of child sexual abuse
by a trusted coach with Penn State I am sharing some important insights that ALL
those who have responsibilities for children should consider. But this is much more than opinion.
What I am sharing is based on my background,
training, and experience as a:
· Retired criminal investigator that have investigated crime against children in the U.S. and abroad.
· Developer and instructor of a national child sex abuse investigation training program.
· Foster parent who has provided a safe haven for more than 30 children.
· Leader in a child welfare agency.
· As the parent of two daughters who were stalked by a sexual predator now serving a length prison
sentence.
· Retired criminal investigator that have investigated crime against children in the U.S. and abroad.
· Developer and instructor of a national child sex abuse investigation training program.
· Foster parent who has provided a safe haven for more than 30 children.
· Leader in a child welfare agency.
· As the parent of two daughters who were stalked by a sexual predator now serving a length prison
sentence.
I can assure
you that child sexual abuse is a threat to every family with children in
America. I have seen the worst of the worst.
Please understand, child sexual abuse is a silent epidemic!
It can happen to any family. You can never be too vigilant.
· 90% of child sexual abuse victims know the perpetrator in some way; 68% are abused by family members.
· Child abuse occurs at every socioeconomic level, across ethnic and cultural lines, within all religions and at all levels of education.
· 90% of child sexual abuse victims know the perpetrator in some way; 68% are abused by family members.
· Child abuse occurs at every socioeconomic level, across ethnic and cultural lines, within all religions and at all levels of education.
In
the past I have personally taken into custody a physician, a clergyman, a scout
leader and a elementary school teacher. Please understand the typically child sex
offender is a well respected member of society, is a skilled communicator, very
friendly and engaging and often well educated.
In
a future blog post I will address what parents and others responsible for the
well being of children can do the protect the children they love.
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